What be the rules?

Aye, thar be a code.

Breaking the code may result in immediate dismissal from battle

or from the fleet if ye be especially repugnant, at captains' discretion.

The sole purpose of the rules be to avoid serious injury & death.

As in any sport, minor injuries can be expected

& may be honored as battle scars.

Th' Piratin' Battle Code:



DO NOT allow the boom to hit ye in head, pay attention and listen to your captain!

i.e. Be alert for tacks & jibes. Generally stay low & balanced.

DO NOT threaten or fire upon other boats/paddleboarders uninvited, for the rental

company will BANISH US if they receive complaints. (Seriously, don't ruin pirating!)

If ye be incapable of swimming for any reason, ye shall be required to wear a life vest at the

captain's discretion, and it shall be termed the "PFD of Shame".

Raiders must STAND DOWN if physically caught while stealing. Each broken cannon is $20.

i.e. Strategize with yer Captain. Be sly; use timing & tactics to escape unnoticed with booty.

Once a raider has clapped ahold of your boat, IMMEDIATELY help them aboard even though ye don't fancy it. A dragging raider can be crushed in the rare collision - this has not happened & we do not be wanting it to.

Captains' Code:

DO NOT battle near the docks or the rental company will BANISH US!

DO NOT sail too close to other boaters/paddleboarders, for the rental company will ALSO BANISH

US if they receive complaints.

Defeated raiders shall not be abandoned in the water if no enemy boats are nearby to save them.

However it be fine to taunt & sail 'round them in circles until they be pleadin' for mercy.

Captains shall stay at least one boat-length distance apart from other vessels.

Captains shall announce tacks/jibes loudly & clearly in Piratin' English.

Captains shall maintain a bow-watch-pirate at all times during battle who communicates incoming traffic & potential dangers to the Captain.

Now, if it not be obvious already,

what be the meaning o' Pirate Sailing?


A pirate's duty be to earn glory for captain & ship by plundering

valuables like cannons & booty from enemy ships, soaking opponents

with water cannons, defending their own boat(s) from raiders,

& remembering that safety be number one!

Here be the general Piratin' Objectives:

Assist your captain in strategically defeating enemy boats.
Raid cannons & loot from enemy ships.
Maintain awareness o' yer surroundings, eyes always peeled fer danger.
During squadron battles be loyal to your team!
Recruit *willing* civilian ships into the fray.
Taunt enemy ships relentlessly.

*Don't* threaten, taunt, or fire upon paddleboarders or other boaters uninvited, for they mustn't be registering complaints against the piratin' fleet.

What to Bring:

Watershoes, sneakers, or boatshoes etc - anything with protection for yer LANDLUBBERY TOES
Piratin' attire from yer favorite thrift shop
Waterproof camera - after battle be postin' pictures to the facebook group

Here be the Battle Positions of a piratin' vessel:

Your lord, commander & Sensei.
Responsible for the boat & its crew.
Always obey your captain.
Cockpit crew:
Responsible for:
One or more watch-persons must be posted at the bow of the boat at all times once the battle begins.
Responsible for keeping the captain informed of any dangers ahead of the boat (via YELLING LOUDLY) - especially those that are obscured by the sails.
Plunder supplies & treasure from enemies via swimming & boarding their ships.
Raiders are to ONLY raid on the orders of their captain
Raiding is accomplished via swimming to & intercepting enemy ships, not by jumping from boat to boat.
Cabin Boy / Cabin Lass
Responsible for management & defense of all gear down below (in the cabin).
Delivers refreshments & praises to the captain.

How does one come aboard?

Th' requirements fer living th' piratin' life be simple:

Must be able to swim!

Must be physical ability to handle yourself on a boat.

Must take commands without hesitation from yer Captain.

To join:

Come aboard the Literally Pirate Sailing Facebook Group & pester captains about upcoming battles. Battle information is divulged to ye who show interest!